The Obese Unicorn

 

Far far away in a land that is made of marshmallows and where the snowflakes are actually lard lives The Obese Unicorn.

Hie eats so much that his vomit is 100% food and thus has cured world hunger in the magical land. People come from miles around to see him in his glory...and to tell him to take a bath now and again. He stinks.

He also sweats when he thinks.

Have a happy period? How about no?

I hate these adverts with happy, bubbly women leaping about and smiling like their faces  will crumble if they stop."Oh I am on my period, I can skydive and shop and act normal!" Fuck off. I want to cry, complain and eat my own weight in chocolate until I feel obese and horrified by myself. Then I will lie under my blankie and hate you all from its protection.